That's What Makes You Beautiful
by the short bus
Summary: Allen and Phillip's life in Sunset Valley!


So one day in the shitty little town of Sunset Valley, a loud scream was heard from the Blackfail residence. It was Phillip Blackfail. He stepped on a small turd that was laying on the living room floor. Phillip flung the turd off his foot and ran to the bathroom. He lifted his foot up towards the sink, but fell because he was so clumsy.

He didn't know where the turd came from or whom it belonged to. He must've slept walked into the living room and made a poop on himself. Phillip pulled down his adult diaper and looked into the back padding, noticing a bundle of turds. He took his diaper off and threw it in the trash. He then put a new, fresh diaper on. Feeling sparkly clean, he pranced into the kitchen to eat a banana.

Suddenly a knock on his ghetto door was heard.

Phillip answered it, the banana in his hand. The face of Allen Ostridge greeted him. Allen was a boy that lived across the street from Phillip. He was very strange and often liked to call the cops for pointless reasons. An example would be the time a bird pooped on his GTO and he accused Phillip for doing it.

"Hi Phillip." Allen said. "I came to let you know that I am throwing a party tonight at 7."

Allen handed Phillip a party invitation that was decorated with butterflies and glitter. Phillip often wondered if Allen was gay, but he had to remind himself that he was dating his other friend Caitlyn...who was a girl.

"Thank you Allen." Phillip said with a smile on his face. "What should I wear?"

Allen gave Phillip the middle finger and walked away. Phillip blinked in confusion but closed the door after watching Allen retreating back to his house. He wondered why Allen invited him to a party, since he was so rude to him sometimes. Something was fishy, and it wasn't his butt.

Phillip shrugged and tossed the invitation into the garbage. He gulped the banana down, peel and all, then ran upstares to pick out an out-fit he could possibly wear to impress Allen and Caitlyn and the rest of the pathetic losers at the party. He let out a fart, wrinkling his nose when he noticed it smelled like rotten fruit. He then picked out a pink shirt that read, 'Daddy's Girl' and some skinny jeans to wear. He put on some flip flops while still wearing socks.

He ran across the street happily, walking up to Allen's doorstep, knocking 3 times and ringing the door bell 76 times.

Allen answered the door with a confused expression on his face, "Why are you here?"

"I'm here for the party!" Phillip said clapping his hands.

"The party doesn't start 'til 7. I just left your house 5 minutes ago to give you a invitation you turd." Allen said sarcastically.

"I'm not Italian, I am Irish." Phillip said cooking hamburgers on the porch of Allen's house.

"Whatever. You can come inside as long as you promise not to eat the plastic fruit on the coffee table." Allen chirped like a bird.

He then let Phillip inside. Phillip walked in to his living room, noticing his house smelled like old people and peppermints. He fanned his nose with his hand as he sat awkwardly on the couch. He looked at the plastic fruit on the coffee table, promising himself not to eat them even though they looked tastey.

"Hi Phillip." a voice said.

Phillip looked up to see Caitlyn in all of her slutty glory. She was wearing only a bra and some panties and fish-net stockings that went up to her thighs. Her hair was wavy and styled by Allen's mom. She was wearing expensive high heels and nearly fell with every step she took but she wore them anyway because she wanted to seem taller. She was so short it wasn't even funny. Even in heels she was probably 2'3.

She climbed up on the couch to sit next to Phillip.

"Why are you hear so early?" she asked.

"I forgot the party started at 7. So what are we gonna be doing at this party?" he asked with a cheesy smile on his face.

"We will probably smoke weed and get drunk. Me and Lil A will most likely end up having sex in the closet. I'm just kidding...I think." she said, putting a finger on her chin.

"Bitch help me set up the food for the party." Allen called out to Caitlyn from the kitchen.

Caitlyn quickly did as she was told, knowing what would happen if she didn't listen to his orders. She fell as she stood up but quickly shook it off and set out cheese and crackers on the party table. She then set out 50 different flavors of chips and atleast 20 different flavors of dip. There was also a huge bowl filled with punch. Then she put a big plate of buffalo wings on the table. Her lipgloss coated lips took hold of one of the chicken wings, swallowing it whole.

"Bitch don't be eating! You will get fat." Allen yelled, slapping Caitlyn's hand.

Phillip felt uncomfortable and was about to poot but then the doorbell rang.

"Yay! The first guests are here." Caitlyn announced.

"Who did ya'll invite?" asked Phillip.

"You, Big Al, Abby, Logan, Dylan, Torey, Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura, Sai, Kakashi, Lil Wayne, Eminem, Drake, Kim Kardashian...and I think Justin Bieber." Caitlyn said happily.

"Wow that is alot." Phillip gasped.

Allen opened the door to see Dylan there with Torey and both of them were holding hands. Dylan kissed the chocolate male on his cheek as they stept into the Ostridge residence. Behind the flirting gay couple was Abby. She was wearing an outfit that looked like something Lil Kim or Nicki Minaj would wear. She flashed a gang sign at Allen as she stepped into his house, automatically heading towards the food table.

Behind the black cat named Abby, Eminem, Drake, and Lil Wayne stepped into the house. Justin Bieber trailed behind them, looking as hot as ever. Kim Kardashian clung to Justin's arm. But, of course they wouldn't date because Kim only dated black guys. She would hit on Lil Wayne or Torey...but Torey was gay and Lil Wayne most likely had 50 different types of STD's.

"Wait. Where is the Naruto crew. Especially Sasuke-kun..." Caitlyn said blushing.

"Right here baby." said a deep voice.

Caitlyn gasped as she saw Sasuke leaning in the door sexily. He stepped in wearing saggy pants and a wife beater. He wrapped his arm around Caitlyn. Caitlyn thought she was going to faint from the contact of the asian god. He kissed her on the cheek and Allen didn't mind because he thought Sasuke was hot too. Sakura nearly slapped Caitlyn off of Sasuke. The pink haired girl was possessive over her man. Naruto bounced in happily and danced towards the food table.

"Wait where is Big Al?" asked Phillip.

"Right here you sexy thang." said a deep voice.

Phillip looked and saw Big Al stepping into the living room. His face was red and a huge peppermint smile was on his face.

Suddenly someone dropped a Cheeto on the floor and Big Al automatically dived for it, swallowing the Cheeto alive. Sasuke took several steps back from the man, hiding behind Sakura's thick booty. Sakura didn't have no tits but she did have a booty.

When no one was looking, Naruto slipped 'something' into the punch. He wanted this party to go crazy.

Suddenly Allen's uncle Larry came in the room. He was bald and fat and his face was redder than a tomato. Larry pooted in the punch bowl adding to the flavor. He wanted to add a special turd flavor to the mix.

"Aye who is the creepy fat guy?" asked Naruto.

"Yeah it looks like Big Al's twin." said Sasuke as he giggled. "Just kidding Big Al. You are way better looking than that guy."

"Thank you." Big Al whispered.

Phillip put in a Taylor Swift CD and sang along to it as the party progressed. Allen was snorting coke off the table with a McDonald's straw. Sasuke and Sakura were making out on a sofa probably about to concieve their first child. Naruto was sulking in the corner because no one was drinking his spiked punch. Big Al, Abby, and Uncle Larry were eating at the table. Eminem, Drake, and Lil Wayne were upstares most likely stealing Allen's furniture. Caitlyn was asleep upstares sleeping in Allen's bed because she loves to sleep all the time.

Logan arrived at the party late because she wanted to avoid meeting Lil Wayne. Seriously he scared her because he looked like a booger monster. Logan was wearing a Clemson t-shirt with some jeans and converse. Her brown hair with blonde tips was pulled back into a pony-tail. She stepped into the living room, noticing everyone was doing their own thing.

"Okay listen up people!" Logan yelled getting everyone's attention. "Where is Justin Bieber?"

Everyone looked around for him but he was nowhere to be found. Logan ran upstares and looked in all the rooms. She opened Allen's mom and dad's room to see them sleeping peacefully despite a loud party going on downstares. She then opened Allen's room, noticing Torey and Dylan having sex on the floor. She looked in every room except Allen's guest room. Opening the guest room, she noticed he was laying nude on the bed. He had six pack abs and a goregous body. He smiled at Logan and motioned for her to come closer.

Back to the party, everything was going great until Abby drank some of the punch. Suddenly she was on top of the coffee table, jumping up and down and rapping perverted rap verses. Allen watched with blissfulness since he was higher than a cloud in the sky. Normally he would challenge her to a booty shaking contest. Allen's cat would beat Abby most likely.

"Holy crap I need to drink some of that punch." Albert said as he sipped a spoonful.

Suddenly his eyes turned red and hair began to grow around his body. His teeth grew jagged and stuck out of his mouth. He howled loudly and ran out the back door and into the forest. Naruto blinked, shocked by Big Al's reaction to the punch. Maybe he shouldn't have trusted Snoop Dogg as one of his drug dealers.

"Anyway...who wants to play spin the bottle?" asked Uncle Larry.

"Ew. Go away you old man." Sasuke screamed as he lifted his head up from between Sakura's legs.

"Ew. I see Sakura's drapes match her curtains if you know what I mean..." Phillip said.

"Stop looking you perv!" Sasuke yelled, smacking Phillips ear.

Phillip cried as his ear was smacked.

Uncle Larry just smiled, his yellow teeth glowing in the dark. He was a huge Naruto supporter and loved Sakura. She had the body of a 12 year old despite being 18. Her titties were so tiny and her ass was so large. He couldn't understand why she didn't get Sasuke to pay for a boob job for her. She would be so sexy if she got a spray tan too also.

Suddenly Allen randomly called the cops on Uncle Larry for staring at his guests in a perverted way. Uncle Larry screamed and ran out the house because he had a child molestation record and he didn't want to get in trouble. Allen called the cops and didn't realize that he had drugs on the residence. Not a smart move.

Everyone at the party except Phillip and a sleeping Caitlyn upstares fled the party as cop cars surrounded his little house.

"Alright. Come out with your hands open." a cop screamed from outside using a bullhorn.

Allen did as he was told, and 30 different cops surrounded him and pushed him to the ground. Allen began crying like a little baby wanting his mommy. His parents had fled the house too because they also had drugs upstares and they didn't want to get in trouble for running a meth house. Allen ate some grass off his lip as he sat in the car.

"Wait officers." Phillip yelled. "Allen is innocent!"

"Go away you peice of poop. I can practically smell the weed and semen on his breath." the cop yelled back.

"You can't just arrest him. Arrest uncle Larry's ugly ass." Phillip insisted.

"Where is that gorilla looking motherfucker." asked a cop.

Suddenly Phillip looked up into a tree in Allen's yard and noticed Uncle Larry eating a apple and leaves.

"Come down you fat ass." the cop yelled, shooting a gun up into the tree.

Uncle Larry fell out the tree and landed on the ground with a loud thud. Allen gasped wondering if uncle Larry was okay. Phillip checked for uncle Larry's pulse and he was still alive unforunately. A cop attacked uncle Larry and threw him in the trunk of the cop car. They took the hand-cuffs off Allen's hairy hands.

"Consider this a warning you faggot." the cop spatted.

a/n: this is my story lol. i hope you like it you lil turds.


End file.
